For those that can understand…..at times I feel that I am repeating myself….that I am rehashing the same thoughts over and over…..yet at the same time the continuous roller coaster of life has me experiencing things over and over from a different perspective.
Yes…I have not experienced the norm. I have undergone “unusual” procedures due to my body being so “unnatural”. Yes…not normal. I have had pelvic organ prolapse repair (due to a prolapsed rectum)…..repair of a peristomal hernia……then the dreaded “tumor”….which was initially disguised because of huge fluid buildups on my ovaries caused by the surgeries. I do have a tumor….thankfully, it appears to be benign……however, it is unsettling! I want that foreign body out! Who cares about the ovaries! I know I cannot have any more children….we are blessed with our angel. My uterus is gone….just want the “invader” and the potential of anything else out!
The issue with me is my uniqueness! I am not the norm. My docs are learning from me…….I am just hoping that I do not have yet another underlying condition that will also have to be dealt with. That is my hope. However, I am not in control. God is. My hope is that the experiences I am having will somehow help someone else.
My son was sitting on the edge of my seat tonight. He summed it up well…”Wow! Are other parents of kids or other kids viewing your website or blog?” “Are we helping someone else?”
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