It is so hard to describe the feelings….that I am experiencing as I move forward with my Husband and son to the next chapter of our lives!
We each have a huge hole that will always be present due to the death of my Sister. So hard….such a huge part of me!!!!
I gave notice at work….my health had been spiraling downhill….only to be magnified when my Sis, Carrie, died!
Our house is almost completely packed in UHaul trailers. We will leave the Oregon Coast Wednesday morning.
We enjoyed a wonderful lunch today with my parents, my brother and his beautiful wife, and my Sister’s partner! So good to seem them! To exchange hugs…laughs….to talk…to share!!!
We each are hurting….aching….we feel that part that is missing…..we each miss our “Carrie” SO much!
Yet…WE…together….are strong! Carrie brought us together…..together we build each other up! We have been united to give each of us more strength.
I am having a hard time describing all of these emotions that are coursing through me! I cannot express myself! I can feel Carrie’s love and concern for Keith, Rachel, Jayson, Crystal, Mom & Dad….her love and protection for Steven and Sophie…….
I feel her LOVE….her pain….for her BELOVED! The overall emotions are coursing through my veins!
I KNOW my SIS loved her boyfriend more than words can express!
I also know that they were never allowed the opportunity to TRULY express their love!
I am still at a complete loss!!!!
I am moving forward…because of my Sis! Yet! I am overtaken…..I am not worthy to continue….to carry the “banner” for her!! Yet…somehow?! She considered me a confidante!
My ONLY hope is to be a strength to others…..to share the power that my Sis had with others!