Embracing life with chronic pain and illnesses.

A Shell of My Former Self

This is the BEST way to describe how my Fibromyalgia and Polyarthralgia having me feeling…..

It was really brought home when out hunting with my hubby and son late yesterday afternoon.  I have a handicap permit so we drive…pull to the side of the dirt road and glass….then proceed.  Yesterday we came to a great spot where the road ended to just step outside of the rig to glass some ridges.

My hubby asked if I thought I could walk about 15 feet from the truck so I could have a better view of one of the ridges….and he and our son went a little ways further to watch a different ridge.

Needless to say….the walk was very slow to get there…then I could only stand for a few minutes…..had to kneel down…..the effort of holding my binoculars was difficult…..I just wanted to be able to glass….to watch the ridge line….

I had to give up within only about 5 – 10 minutes!  My hubby had to help me back to the truck….then I was able to lean on the truck to rest…..attempted to glass a while more…..

So frustrating to deal with HUGE slap of reality!  I am only a shell of my former self!  I used to be able to hike…at least a short ways!  Even with the chronic pain conditions I was dealing with.  Fact is…Fibromyalgia and Polyarthralgia ARE SO radically different!!!

My conditions are still out of control. I am awaiting the appointment with my Rheumatologist to go over all the tests and imaging reports.  I am anxious to see if there are other conditions that are helping to confuse the situation!

My chest and arms are burning….arms, legs, hips, hands, feet, hips and back are hurting/aching SO deeply!  It IS overwhelming…..and the memory issues have not improved at all either…..

Struggling through each day….as so many of you know….is BEYOND exhausting…..it takes everything I have to make it through the day….to attempt to participate….

There is NO easy fix….there is NO magic pill….it IS a long…hard road…..I just keep my eyes fixed on that future day….when I will be able to walk (even a short distance) to sit and glass….with my hubby and son…..enjoying the time in the outdoors….

Comments on: "A Shell of My Former Self" (1)

  1. Barbara CT said:

    I empathize with you as I also have fibromalgia, along with other autoimmune issues. I can no longer kneel or squat as I don’t have the strength in my calf muscles to push up. I’m going to my pain management doctor tomorrow at the request of my rheumatologist. I had asked her about using low dose naltrexone (aka LDN) and she said it was most definitely an option for me. I had been, and continue, to read about this treatment that is so promising for more than just fibromyalgia. I urge you to look into this treatment also. There are many videos on YouTube about how it works, testimonials, etc. There are also some Facebook groups you can check out. The following websites will also help answer questions: http://www.ldnresearchtrust.org and http://www.lowdosenaltrexone.org. I hope this gives you as much hope as it gives me.

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