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Loss and Chronic Pain

Dealing with chronic pain is difficult…..dealing with the loss of someone so close is hard…..

It is hard to find words to describe the quagmire that I am in now. I I have pushed through….and been living with chronic illness and chronic pain for so long!

My Sis, Carrie, was such a huge support! She was always there for me! She was always my rock!

My chronic pain disorder, polyarthralgia and fibromyalgia are still providing huge challenges….as previously stated….no one I have seen yet can offer any true options……

I do not expect answers…..I have had TOO many situations in which I have been the “unique”….the “one in a million” case….or as my Sis would say…..”you are SO special”!!!!

I just hope to have some semblance of “normalcy” or control….just enough to have the opportunity to walk with my husband and son…..

I do NOT expect to be able to run again (although I am not willing to give up that dream)!

Yet…I am wrestling with the pain…the gut wrenching loss of no long having my Baby Sis……being the one that was supposed to always be there and protect her…..

The twisted paths we weave! My Sis was enjoying the best part of her life! She was happy and making a difference! She touched MORE lives than most! Of that I am SO proud!!!

I guess I am just trying to say…that LIFE is HARD! God opens doors…and provides paths for us to walk…..it is then up to us to go through those doors and to walk…..to persevere….to NOT lose our faith! It is our unique challenge to move forward….to keep taking one step after another….

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