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Posts tagged ‘chronic illness’

Body Aches

The warmth of the fire

Gently heating the room

Creating a cozy feeling

That relaxes the mind…

Sitting in the recliner

With feet elevated

To best calm the stabbing

To help rest the throbbing

And aching that permeates the body…

Light pours through the window

Reflections from the snow

Ever brighten the early morning

The sun hidden behind the clouds

As if wrapped in a soft gray blanket…

Thoughts race in the mind

As ears ring in a deafening tone

Increasing in intensity

No amount of distraction

Can calm the turbulence within…

Eyes and heart are smiling

At the beauty of the day

The memories of a year almost done

Distractions viewed with appreciation…

The Secret Within

Outward appearances misspeak

Showing health and vitality;

Inwardly rages a battle

Symptoms vying for position…

No scan, no image, no x-ray

Will show the culprit;

Pain, searing and stabbing

Has no visible face…

Only the hidden grimace

The silent groan;

Expressed in the heavy sigh

Or the slow deep breath…

A burden shared by few

When united find strength;

To find comfort and solace

In fighting the secret within…

Financial Stress

I awoke from a light slumber this morning knowing that I had to try to reach out…to speak up about one of the big stressors that can weigh heavily on us. The unfortunate side of chronic illness…how it can destroy our finances. This thought was heavy on my mind  as my body craved sleep.

In my situation, it has taken me out of the workforce. My husband had struggled to find employment…always coming in second when interviewed!  Yet a door was opened for him to start his own business…which we see starting to grow.

In the meantime, as I am sure many of you can relate to, we have had to use credit more than we would normally. The medical bills (that will keep coming), groceries (especially when you add in those of us with special dietary needs), the high cost of insurance, house payments/rent, fuel costs, clothing, shoes for our ever growing kids, and on and on. Even with careful spending…being as stingy as possible…stretching every dollar as far as possible, we see our savings (if lucky enough to have any) disappearing quickly.  We are forced to look at selling our homes, taking out a second mortgage, or worse…find ourselves homeless.

It is important to take advantage of all of the programs possible. Remember, when we were “healthy”, we were working, paying into those programs.  Sign your children up for the reduced/free lunches at school if you qualify, apply for food stamps, seek out other possible assistance programs you may qualify for…this is not easy, I know. It requires a change in our mindset…to see these programs as an opportunity to receive some assistance during a rough spell. You may qualify for just a few…or you may qualify for all. Allow yourself to embrace this opportunity for some relief.

We put on a brave face for our children, our families, our friends. Yet this stress is one that we have little to no control over. It can increase our symptoms, resulting in Fibro Flares, IBS flares, bacterial infections, additional illnesses…causing us to go into a serious health spiral…as if we are not all ready dealing with enough!

Take time for yourself.  Nap if you need to…find ways to relieve your stress. I use writing as my stress relief…I also spend much time praying and reading scripture.  (Reading as best as one can with the Fibro Fog that is so variable…from a thin fog to a heavy veil.) I take advantage of the view out my window.  I find a silly science fiction movie to watch…or work a puzzle on my iPad…distractions that are a huge help!

This is a very difficult path we walk…yet…we are not alone! We can build each other up…through the many on-line communities, whether we choose illness/condition specific or more generalized chronic illness/pain sites. Remember you are not alone…even if you are primarily home bound like me.

Gratitude Journal

I had the pleasure of attending a “Gratitude Gala” this evening….a wonderful soup and salad dinner with women of our community.  

The opportunity to get together with friends is always nice (especially when not feeling well). Yet the “program” left a huge impression!

Three ladies had been asked to speak about what they are thankful for…each spoke from the heart…from a favorite fond memory to the idea of having a Gratitude Journal.

Each of us was challenged to keep a Gratitude Journal…to write one thing that we are thankful for at the end of each day. This could be done in a Journal…a notebook…on computer…on our smart phone (via Instagram or the like). It can be written…can be a photo with a brief description…whatever our preferred way.

I am excited to accept this challenge! I would encourage each and everyone to try this! 

Freshness of the Morning


img_5646The early morning light

Peering out between the clouds

The freshness of the breeze

Gentle against the skin

Like the touch of a loved one

Eyes close to savor the moment

The call of birds

The buzz of a lazy bee

The gentle roll of a fish

Its scales glistening

The water around gently rippling

Followed by silence

The quiet of the early morning

Senses aroused by the freshness

As nature awakens…


Pain Med…

It has been a while since I blogged….time has gotten away from me! With my body adjusting to the pain med which has taken a slight edge off (yeah!)….extreme brain fog…registering our son for 8th Grade (YIKES)….and going out of town for a long weekend….followed by the inevitable “week after”….LOL

The pain med did help with the usual increased flare that follows the time away. I found that I was more tired and dealt with much more nausea than I have in the past. My body was very heavy and tired…

I had a follow up with my pain specialist…we have established the next step! I will continue to use the pain med as a “band aid” until I can get in for a trial to see if a pain pump (Targeted Drug Delivery) will work for me.

I am anxious yet ready for this next step. The risks of the pain pump are outweighed by the benefits….the idea of not having my internals in distress (just part of the necessary side effect of the pain med) is huge since my IBS-D and overly sensitive intestinal tract are not pleased….

I am gimping along with the great suggestions from my GI Specialist and my Low FODMAP diet…it is just nice to think there could be an option that might work for me!

Speak Up

We can often be our own worst enemies….in a recent conversation that I had with a “new” friend…I was disappointed to hear that she knows others with Fibromyalgia; however, they do not speak about it, nor do they speak of their experiences.

I have found that by opening myself up….by speaking about my various conditions/illnesses, that I have not only helped myself, that I have also helped others around me.

My family and friends have a better understanding of what I am dealing with. Others with similar conditions have been a great source of encouragement! It is so helpful to exchange ideas, medications tried, relaxation techniques, exercise options, etc. This is also huge in reinforcing the fact that we are NOT alone!

We must also be prepared to speak up to our doctors….our specialists….it is the only way to continue to raise awareness of our hidden conditions/illnesses…by speaking up we can help direct bring attention to these little known conditions/illnesses that impact so many of us.

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