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Posts tagged ‘poetry’

Awake?!?!

The beauty of the sky

The myriad of colors

The sounds of life abound

Even with the ever ringing in the ears…

It is as if I had been in a lifetime slumber

My senses forever dulled

Reaching upwards for help

While overwhelmed in quicksand…

Illness strips us of the familiar

We are thrust into the unknown

Each step taken as with a blindfold

Hands outstretched groping in darkness…

Our medical teams struggle

Conditions and illnesses so misunderstood

Further muddled by myriad of symptoms

Each of us so different from the other…

We search for answers

Yet try as we might

We find health elusive

Stripped from us and locked away

Secreted in the darkest, farthest corner…

We are tried and tested in ways indescribable

As words are a shallow testament

To the inner symptoms that abound

Forever changing and challenging…

 

Homebound

Walls so familiar

Known by touch

As they prevent a fall

Become prison like

When confined for length of time…

There is safety here

Albeit superficial

As it cannot prevent dizziness

The hand holds are a comfort

To catch and to prevent harm…

Eyes unfocused

Through a thick veil of fog

I shuffle to my chair

Sunshine brightens the room…pexels-photo-48828

The warmth of the rays

Reaching through the window

Allow my mind’s eye

To envision the shore…

I hear the water

In the fast flowing stream

Rushing past, racing ahead

Free and untethered…

Wave upon wave has hit

Driving my backwards

The sun offers hope

Its warmth reassurance

As I slowly move ahead…

A knock on the door

The bright smile of a friend

The exchange of hugs

To sit and talk

The walls dissolve…

No longer a prison

The walls provide safety

To allow much needed rest

To help increase strength

Albeit slowly…

Mindset is recharged

Embracing the colors

The small buds on the trees

The retreating snow

A body at peace…

 

 

 

The Secret Within

The internal struggle

Forever raging within

The only thing for certain

Is the ever present pain…

Appearances are deceivingsun-beach-st-peter-obi-baltic-sea-163867

Just as a smile hides the truth

The outer shell is a disguise

Causing questioning glances…

The mirror betrays

Reinforcing a false narrative

And reinforcing the changes

A reminder of all that is lost…

Guided by our self knowledge

We do our bestTo follow the narrow path

Strewn with boulders and potholes…

No amount of care

Prevents the impacts upon us

The frustration our family and friends endure

Hurting those most close to us…

Our hidden conditions and illnesses

Attempt to rob us of all

Destroy our finances

Replace what is taken with isolation…

We utilize the tools we have

Each carrying his own set

Medication, exercise, meditation just a few

Combined with family and friend support…

We are united to others

Similar paths shared

A brave front we will show

As we fight an unseen enemy…

 

 

Nagging

Miriam-Webster’s definition “to irritate by constant scolding or urging”.

Now let us see, as we turn the mind’s eye inward,

I see the perfect parallel to our path with pain.

We are under the constant scourge

The overbearing pressure

With the constant knowing

That we are no longer in control.

It is not by our own volition

For we did not seek this fight

Nor did we ask for his assistance

Yet here we are, in league and alongside.

We are driven to depths unknown

We see and experience well beyond most

Yet we are driven to continue

To press forward, to endure.

Our path often misunderstood

For no-one except one of us

Can truly catch, or grasp, the meaning

Of our relationship with Pain.

For ours is a hidden path

One that is misunderstood

To bear what is cloaked

Unseen by the many.

We are charged to share

To shine, even a momentary light

To the hidden culprit

Who is urging us forward

Displaying our weakest moments to all.

It is our companion

Our ever present guide

Upon this path we did not seek

This that sets us a part from others.

It is our relationship with Pain

Our hidden struggle

That has forged a strong bond

No longer against….but with.

The Leaf

As a leaf on a tree

It’s bright vibrant green

Soaking up the sun

Full of health and vitality

It witnesses many days

The drip of the soft rain

That caresses its surface

Providing a refreshing cascade

The iridescent glow

Of droplets backlit with the sun

The season begins to change

The night becomes longer

No longer the brilliant green

It is now cloaked

In a coat of many colors

Brilliant orange and yellow

Drifting softly towards the ground

The wind catches and carries

Its precious load to the water

The swift running creek below

Caught by the breeze

The leaf falls

Back and forth it dances

With an unseen partner

Until it gently settles

On the surface of the waters

Dry Tears

The incredible stabbing pain

Coursing through my groin

Burning as with flames

Eagerly licking the dry wood

Growing higher and hotter…

Thinking is muddled

As distraction is impossible 

No measure of stillness

No medication can calm

The overwhelming sensations…

I cannot hide the grimaces

Moans escape on their own

For I am not aware that I made them

As the searing knives slice my flesh

And the ice picks pierce through…

Tears are not falling

Dry eyes hide the truth

That which is hidden from sight

No image depicts the war

That wages within…

If only the pain 

Could be captured on X-ray or MRI

To be shown as the cruel dictator it is

The thief that has taken so much

Yet is never satisfied with its spoils…

To hope for a less painful tomorrow 

Not knowing what will come

Grasping for breath to attempt to dispel

The downward spiral 

Of a body out of control…

Wave Upon Wave

As the waves

Crash upon the shoreline11803762-sea-waves-breaking-on-the-rocks-stock-photo

So the waves

Of pain cascade throughout

Transforming every nerve

Into a volatile eruption

Senses overwhelmed

As spasms wrack an all ready tired frame…

Relentless crashing against the rocks

The waves continue to pound

As a hammer yet without mercy

Pounding and changing the shoreline

Demonstrating such power
As it rewrites the coast line

So with the intensity of pain

Every fibre of our being

Crying out…rather screaming

Albeit a silent scream

Unheard by human ears…1081-1242414452ggmy

Tide pools are hidden

As the waves come in

The tide ever rising

The sand disappearing

Its watery blanket

So the transmission of activity

Nerves not relentingThe grimace…the groan…

The feeling of weakness

The tears that well up

That refuse to fall

Release from the tight grip

Wishful thinking…forcing a bowed head

Prayers for relief

Just the slightest…please…

Waves continue

To batter the shore

The intensity will

It must refrain

This heightened level will not keep

As prayer for strength

To navigate this path…

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