The Impact of Loss
Our son was given an assignment in English this week. His teacher asked that the class “brain storm” and then write a story…a true story…about something that taught them some type of a moral lesson. It was to have conflict, climax, etc.
He was very frustrated with this assignment. “Mom…my life is flat….other classmates came up with ideas right away…”
I started mentioning ideas…hoping to spark his creative interest…
“What about our move?”
“No!” he said emphatically. Tears welling in his eyes.
“Why not?” I asked knowing the answer.
“Because it involves Aunt Carrie. I have to keep that inside.” His tearful response.
I reassured him that it is okay to cry….it is okay to miss his Aunt…that I and many others miss her very much…each and every day. I also reassured him that talking about it helps. And, that I understood why he would not want to use that as a topic in class.
After some more discussion, he hit upon his go cart that he had made with his Dad…perfect story! He was able to immediately map out his thoughts for how he could present it in story form…showing how the process had strengthened his self confidence.
Yes, it has been one year and five months since that life changing day. The day that forever changed so many lives!
Last night reminded me again, of how challenging the sudden death of someone so close is for our children. They do not have the resources that we as adults have…the experiences…the maturity to muddle their way through.
It is vitally important that we take time…take the time sit with them…to allow them to talk, sit in silence, or cry. We have to help them…to guide them through the grieving process.